Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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