found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
