Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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