How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
