she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Randomize