Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
My balls are so social today.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
