At least make sure they are 18
Why
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
