What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
