its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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