Umm I'm too high to move.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
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