i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Randomize