3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize