Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
