When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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