Who wears a wallet chain?!
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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