I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
