Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
