thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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