why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?Â
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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