His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Randomize