Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
