butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
