I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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