It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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