im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
