I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
