Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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