I heard we made out
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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