so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize