Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
