just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
