STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
