question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
