we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize