I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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