how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
