bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize