physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
