3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
sarcasm needs its own font
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
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