K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
