I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize
