she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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