So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Need sex. Gaining weight.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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