So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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