My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
