woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
