Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
