dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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