Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize