there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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