hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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