Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
It's blow job season.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
